Ask a (S)expert: "Is Breakup Sex Always a Bad Idea?"

Welcome to your new safe space and Hypebae's first-ever sex and dating column, Ask a (S)expert. This new weekly series is led by Haitian-Chinese and LA-based sexpert Gigi Fong, our in-house sex and dating editor.

Gigi is a former sex worker and podcaster now hosting safe spaces for the Hypebae community. She specializes in all things sex-positive from unconventional dating to pleasure. To have your questions answered, visit our dropbox below and anonymously send your intimate inquiries ♡

"Is breakup sex always a bad idea? We still love each other."

Ah, break up sex. The thing we hate just as much as we love it.

If you’ve never been wrapped up in a toxic love affair, one, thank yourself and two, DON’T. EVER.

Breakup sex in theory is an amazing idea. It hits all the touch points: pleasure, comfort and (perceived) healing. Even I’ve uttered the words "let’s fuck one last time" – against my better judgment. Why? Well, last-time sex for starters is rarely ever the last time. And if it is, are you prepared to part ways after amazing, vulnerable and emotional sex? Exactly. Not wise queen!!!

It can also spark feelings of regret afterward if you aren’t proud of your decision. Unfortunately, sometimes as humans, we listen to our urges more than our subconscious meaning, you won’t know it was a poor decision until post-nut-clarity enters the chat.

Last but not least -- because I know what you're thinking -- pleasure. After the breakup, you're probably thinking of what this means for your sex life. And that's completely normal. You're reminiscing on the sex from your ex because that's the closest reference for one, and two, you're craving closeness. The smartest investment is creating a fresh, new sex life with new characters and an even more exciting plot.

So, before deciding to have sex one last time, ask yourself: can I live with this decision tomorrow and not cry about it?

There’s your answer.

Best of luck, bae!

In other news, LELO predicts the future of sex.

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